KFC takes a breather from killing off the human race

15 Nov

Today Colonel Sander’s gang sank the notorious Double Down back into the broiler.

The fried chicken-as-bun with bacon and cheese sandwich, which contains enough sodium and fat to fell a Clydesdale horse, has now been taken off the menu at KFC stores in Canada after only a month.

Same thing happened in the U.S. in the spring before public clamour led to its reincarnation as regular menu fixture. Expect the same up here.

Despite pressure from various levels of government, the Double Down has been a huge success for KFC. Canadians have double-downed roughly a million of these heart attacks.

An amusing outcome of the Double Down’s introduction is all the spin-off coronary sandwiches created by amateur competitors, including this 5,000 calorie monster from “Angry French Canadians” (see if you can stomach the gross-out YouTube video here), which stuffs bacon, cheese, poutine and hot dogs, including the buns, on a baguette and drenches the whole mess in maple syrup.

There are no reports of deaths from the Double Down, but you have to wonder about a food company that is so eager to hang its apron on such an unhealthy slug of a product.

It may be a marketing success story, but it leaves a nasty taste in my mouth.


12 Responses to “KFC takes a breather from killing off the human race”

  1. AT November 15, 2010 at 2:06 pm #

    Reminds me of a 30 Rock episode where Tracy Jordan proclaimed:”Meat is the new bread!”

  2. Cody Campbell November 15, 2010 at 2:50 pm #

    Who thought a company would try so hard to kill off its customers? They must have a “creative customer extermination” division (more realistically known as “sandwich artistry”) to come up with these artery cloggers.

    The irony here is that the more loyal one is to KFC, the shorter their lifespan is as a customer (and a person for that matter). These fast food establishments have it all wrong. We see their attempt to jump on the health food craze by offering salads and “healthy menu options”, but who really believes this? The only people who buy that stuff are the ones that get dragged out to fast food joints by their friends. They have no other alternative, however, they do their best to avoid that grease drizzling burger with a weeks worth of calories packed inside a machine made sesame seed bun!

    …oh wait… they don’t do buns anymore-they Double Down!

  3. Amy November 15, 2010 at 3:19 pm #

    Yes, this sandwich is disgusting. However, I kind of have to applaud KFC for having the balls to sell this sandwich. They know their food isn’t healthy. Heck, they know their food isn’t really even food and obviously they don’t care. They know who their customers are and they shovel out the food they know the masses will eat.
    I don’t blame the masses either. Most of them just don’t know any better.

  4. dougbrowncreative November 15, 2010 at 3:25 pm #

    > Adem, I recall when bread was going to be the new meat. This is reverse evolution.

    > Cody, that’s a clever argument and I wish I’d thought of it. They are killing off their own customers, therefore their business! If that doesn’t lead to a wholesale menu change I don’t know what will.

    > I’m not sure it takes balls to sell this weapon Amy. Just a complete lack of heart.

    Thanks all for the comments. Now back to lunch!

  5. variedthinking November 15, 2010 at 3:33 pm #

    I have to disagree with one the point that Amy made about the masses not knowing any better. I believe they do know better, but since it is convenient, rather cheap and it shuts the kids up then parents will keep shovelling it down their kids throats, just like they do with pizza and cardboard BIG Mac hamburgers. They would’nt have them so close to each other if this was’nt the case.

    Another example of this and this reflects the adult readers, is all the coffee shops so closely pack together in cities. They know your addicted to coffee, just like kids are addicted to junk food.

  6. dougbrowncreative November 15, 2010 at 3:38 pm #

    I guess that’s kind of why all the women’s shoe stores are packed together in the Bay Centre…

    You know what though Variedthinking, I do believe you’re right.

  7. dougbrowncreative November 15, 2010 at 5:31 pm #

    There’s a fantastic expose of this food item on this Vancouver Foodie Blog: http://imonlyhereforthefood.com/2010/10/kfc-double-down-in-canada/

    The photos alone are worth it.

  8. Chris Burdge November 15, 2010 at 5:44 pm #

    Much like the, hopefully terrifying, and dissuasive images of someone’s black cancer filled lungs on the front of a cigarette box, they should have images of obese people dying of a heart attack on the packaging of this and most other fast food. And add a 40% tax to it so this junk isn’t cheaper to buy than a head of lettuce. #JustSayin

  9. dougbrowncreative November 15, 2010 at 5:48 pm #

    What a fantastic idea Chris. Imagine how graphic that could be…

    I also agree on the big tax but think we should use it to defray the medical costs associated with consumption of this garbage. #JustAgreein

  10. Maureen Blaseckie November 15, 2010 at 6:10 pm #

    This is all part of some demented machismo backlash = real men drink beer that is the same colour entering the body as leaving it; wear manly aftershave – not some mamby pamby metro-sexual body spray or other skin products; and eat salad only if you call the pickle and lettuce on a big mac “salad.

    The double down is directed towards this pack of musk ox/men who eat it as a dare. The same kind of guys who gobble down whole jalepeno peppers, then up the ante to scotch bonnets in some bizarre wasabi driven frenzy to prove who is more manly.

    You can no more legislate against this form of thinking than against stupidity itself. These are the people who cry about living in a nanny state and too much government coddling. Speaking out against it only puts you on the side of the sexually ambiguous which is something they are going to great steps of self-injury to deny in themselves…oh dear, I think I’m off on a tangent.

    I’ll go and lie down in a dark room now…all we can do is hope at some point these sort of folk will go on a group bike ride w/o their helmets off some convenient cliff.

  11. dougbrowncreative November 15, 2010 at 6:16 pm #

    Comment of the day…..HA!

  12. Reg November 16, 2010 at 8:41 am #

    Maureen, I’d like to meet you. That was brilliant, funny, incisive and, yes, a bit hard-line — dare I say macho? Thanks for my morning chuckle.

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